Upon our arrival in Sicily, Giada and I were exploring the island and found what we thought was a totally secluded cove and beach. There was not another person in sight (probably because they were hiding in the bushes near the cliffs).

We were actually there for about an hour softly talking, kissing and stroking each other. I remember we were talking about Papa Gaetano and how there was no way that we were going to keep my being with Cousin Giada in Italy a secret (especially since we were staying in the family owned apartment).

Anyway, Giada had this look of longing in her eyes that was overwhelming. I pulled my camera out of the beach bag and quickly snapped a shot of her. She became totally serious and informed me that she wanted to marry me and have babies. She actually proposed to me right then and there.

I almost fell over (Crafan horror stories started running through my head). It is bad enough that we are cousins but, what really complicates the matter is that this is not the first time something like this has happened in our family. My Sicilian aunt married her uncle back in the day and that totally freaked out the family. This is just going to be a reminder of that marriage and why the family has such a problem with me (despite the fact Cousin Giada and I are not really that closely related).

Anyways, I accepted the proposal and Giada is all over me. We are totally lost in our lovemaking on the beach when suddenly, I hear a male voice in a cheerful manner say: “Bella Serra” (which makes no sense as it was only late afternoon). Giada screams and is struggling to find something to cover herself with and accidentally knees me solidly right in the nuts.

I am doubled over in agony, she is in a total panic and the two cops are laughing their heads off. They are trying to speak to me but, I cannot understand a word they are saying either because they are speaking in Sicilian or because of the insane pain. I heard Cousin Giada say something about how we thought we were alone and that she had just proposed to me and that we were lost in the moment.

It really didn’t seem to matter to these two clowns. Apparently, there have been some new “morality laws” passed in Italy during the last couple of years and they are cracking down on amorous couples no matter how secluded they think they are. The cops seemed intent on taking ME in. Not both of us, just me. One of the cops was helping me to stand up all the while jabbering something to me I could not understand. Suddenly, Giada blurts out in a sobbing tone: “Please don’t take him away…. He is my COUSIN and Papa will kill him if he finds out”

The cop helping me to stand suddenly shuts up. Both stand there for a moment with stupid looks on their faces. They ask Giada to repeat herself and Giada goes off on this tangent about how we are cousins and have been in love for years, separated by a continent, ocean, family and outdated religions beliefs. The cops just look at each other and say nothing. The guy helping me to stand smiles and pats me on the shoulder and says in standard Italian: “Go home…. your bed is more comfortable than this rocky beach“. They then part and don’t say a word to each other as they are walking away.

I don’t know how we are going to deal with this. Apparently, Papa Gaetano never found out about me being there which will help calm the situation down. I really do not know how to proceed from here. It is going to be bad.

Here is a pic of Giada just before all hell broke loose.


http://s245.photobucket.com/albums/gg63/...